In
the modern
era we hear a lot about divorces, separation and broken relationships
among
married people. Reports about lack of faithfulness in marital
relationships among
the spouses are on the increase. Family being the cornerstone of
Christian society
care has to be taken to nurture the family bond. During the year of
faith as we deepen our faith experience and recommit ourselves to
witness the risen lord our family bonds have to be renewed.Christian
family is the place where children receive the first proclamation of
the faith.
For this reason the family home is called domestic church. Domestic
church is a
community of grace and prayer. It is a school of human virtues and
Christian
charity. The Christian faith initiated through the sacrament of Baptism
is
supported and strengthened in the family. The role parents to inculcate
the
faith in their offspring are inevitable. It is through the sacrament of
matrimony the spouses receive the grace to fulfill their commitments. In
this context an understanding
of the sacrament of Matrimony in light of catholic teaching is
necessary.
Teaching of
Catholic Church
As specified in the Canon Law, by marriage a man and a woman enter into a contract giving their personal consent to live together as partners for their whole life.[1] This contract is for a life of love, caring, understanding, communion, fellowship, giving, taking, sacrifice, etc. Marriage should be understood as some thing more than a contract. It is a covenantal relationship established through the free, informed consent of both Man and woman. It happens when a man and a woman who are free to marry and are physically and emotionally capable of marriage give themselves to each other, understanding that marriage means openness to life and commitment to faithful love till death. When that happens between two unbaptized people, a natural marriage bond is formed that is greatly respected by the Catholic Church. When it happens between two baptized persons, the Holy Spirit is poured out and the natural bond is elevated to a supernatural sacrament. The natural blessings of marriage are the companionship, mutual support and intimacy of the spouses plus the possibility of sharing in God’s creative, life-giving work–the procreation and education of children. In a sacramental marriage, there is an additional goal–the spouses accept the vocation to be a prophetic, visible sign of the unbreakable covenant between Christ and His Church. The model of Christian marriage as per St. Paul is the way Jesus loved the Church: a total self-giving even at the cost of sacrificing one’s own life.
As specified in the Canon Law, by marriage a man and a woman enter into a contract giving their personal consent to live together as partners for their whole life.[1] This contract is for a life of love, caring, understanding, communion, fellowship, giving, taking, sacrifice, etc. Marriage should be understood as some thing more than a contract. It is a covenantal relationship established through the free, informed consent of both Man and woman. It happens when a man and a woman who are free to marry and are physically and emotionally capable of marriage give themselves to each other, understanding that marriage means openness to life and commitment to faithful love till death. When that happens between two unbaptized people, a natural marriage bond is formed that is greatly respected by the Catholic Church. When it happens between two baptized persons, the Holy Spirit is poured out and the natural bond is elevated to a supernatural sacrament. The natural blessings of marriage are the companionship, mutual support and intimacy of the spouses plus the possibility of sharing in God’s creative, life-giving work–the procreation and education of children. In a sacramental marriage, there is an additional goal–the spouses accept the vocation to be a prophetic, visible sign of the unbreakable covenant between Christ and His Church. The model of Christian marriage as per St. Paul is the way Jesus loved the Church: a total self-giving even at the cost of sacrificing one’s own life.
Marriage
a Sacrament
Marriage is a Sacrament. This means that it is
an action of Jesus Christ in the Church. The sacraments are ritual signs which
give grace to the person who receives them.
When
the priest baptises a baby, he pours water on the baby's head. This is a sign
of washing and of new life. We believe that at the Baptism, Jesus Christ washes
away sin and gives the baby new life in the Church.
During
marriage, spouses will exchange vows with each other. They will make solemn
promises that are binding for the whole of your life together. This exchange of
vows is a sign of the work of Jesus Christ who joins the spouses in the
unbreakable bond of marriage. According to Latin tradition spouses themselves
are the ministers of the marriage. Spouses will give the sacrament to each
other. The priest is there to conduct the service according to the rite of the
Church (Latin Tradition), to witness your marriage and to bless the spouses. In
oriental tradition the Priest is the minister of the sacrament. His Blessings
and presence is needed for a valid marriage.
The
Catholic Church teaches that the purposes of marriage are for the procreation
and upbringing of children and of the mutual welfare and support of the couple.
Neither of these can be deliberately excluded.
This is what makes married love different from any other
love. The Church teaches that the use of sex should be reserved to marriage so
that children can be brought up in a stable home where the parents are
committed to them and to each other.
In teaching that sex is for having children within marriage,
the Church also teaches that the use of artificial contraception and
sterilisation is wrong and contrary to the natural law. There may be serious
reasons why a couple might decide to have no more children. In such a case, the
use of natural family planning involves a joint decision and responsibility.
NFP also involves mutual respect, generosity and self-control. These values are
always important in married life even when there is no need to limit the number
of children.
The mutual
welfare and support of the couple
The companionship involved in Marriage cannot be achieved
outside of Marriage. The unconditional lifelong commitment made in Marriage
makes it quite different from just living together. It is important to realize
this and to be well prepared for it.
Marriage will not be the solution if a relationship is in
trouble. Experience and research show that it is more likely to hasten the
breakdown of the relationship.
The Properties of Marriage
The properties of marriage are unity and indissolubility. Conjugal love
of the spouses demands indissolubility and faithfulness in a definite mutual
self giving between one man and woman..
The unity
of Marriage
Marriage is between one man and one wife. It is necessary to
be aware of the kinds of relationship that are incompatible with marriage. It
is not just a question of adultery. A husband and wife have a legitimate claim
on each other's time, attention and affection. This does not always happen
automatically and may require self-control and determination to keep the
promises made on the Wedding day.
This is well-known and great anguish is caused when
Marriages break up. Again, it shows Marriage to be very different from simply
living together. The vows, once made, cannot be made to another person while
both partners are still alive.
We need not be too gloomy about divorce. Even if 1 in 3
marriages break up, that means that 2 in 3 stay together! And many Marriages
that break up are ill-considered and ill-prepared. By preparing well for your
Marriage, you lay the foundations for a happy life together. In the parish, we
often have the joy of celebrating the anniversaries of people who have been
married for 25 or 40 years or more. They are normal people who have lived
faithfully together though the ups and downs of married life.
Reflection
Sacrament
of Matrimony signifies the union of Christ and Church. In this union we see the
mutual self giving of the Church and Christ to one another in love. The
intimate union of marriage, as a mutual giving of two persons demand total
fidelity from the spouses and require an unbreakable union between them.
Spouses are called to grow continually in their communion through day to day
fidelity to their marriage promise of total mutual self giving. Conjugal love
demands indissolubility and faithfulness in a definite mutual
self giving of the spouses and it is open to fertility. The sacrament of matrimony gives
the spouses the grace to love each other with the love with which Christ loved
His church. The grace of the sacrament perfects human love of the spouses and
strengthens their indissoluble unity. It helps one another to attain holiness
in their married life and in welcoming and educating their children. Further
the grace of the marriage sanctifies them on their way to eternal life.
It may
seem impossible to bind oneself for life to another human being. However the
love that married couples share through their binding bear witness to the
definite and irrevocable love of God. By the very nature the institution of
marriage and the conjugal love is ordered to the procreation and education of
offspring and it is in them that it finds its crowning glory.
